Posted by MiKE @ 4:37 PM (PST)
I just jad PRK Laser Eye surgery, and I will be updating this post regularly over the next few days as my eyes heal up.
Day 1: 3 PM: This is when I got it done. Will actually write about it later, as my vision it blurry as fuck right now. A really blurrey fuck. Like a Bigfoot sex tape.
4 PM: Getting a ride home, no pain at all, my eyes are so watery that I look like an emo kid who couldn't afford the latest My Chemical Romance CD. I have awesome distance vision but really shitty near vision. I can barely see what I'm typing. Eyes are starting to get a little sensetive to light.
4:30 PM: Put some lubricating eyedrops in my eyes, gotta keep stuff lubed up. They're starting to sting a little, I think it's time for some shuteye. At 6 PM I take a whole new set of drops.
I turned down the brightness and contrast all the way down on my computer monitors cause they are starting to hurt my face.
5:30 PM Had a nap. Hard to sleep with some type of verbal apocalypse ocurring outside my room. Eyes still teary like the lead singer of Simple Plan. More sensetive to light, but still only slightly stinging. Every blink feels gross.
6 PM: Put the 2 hour and 4 hour drops in. The 4 hour ones sting... good thing they're only every 4 hours! Aghk. Eyes are starting to feel dryer than a nun's pussy. From reading other PRK experiences on here this seems a bit early. EWWW I can taste the eyedrops in my mouth, through my eye! Lol what the fuck?
7 PM: Another nap, then woke up and put more lube eyedrops in. Ran into somewhat of an emergency. There was a fucking eyelash in my eye, stuck next to the contact lens they put in. It felt like my eyeball had a needle sticking out of it. I had to use the tip of my finger to nudge it out, while looking in the mirror with a bright light next to me. It was some ER type shit I was doing.
Everytime I go on here to update it seemd the screen is more and more of a pain to look at.
8:30 PM Just wooke up from like my 439089234th nap, eyes still feel the same. Sweet! Now I'm just hungry as fuck, so I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat. I'm looking forward to some fresh air as my eyes feel kinda hot right now.
By the way, a miraculous thing has occurred, I've actually been remembering to take all my eyedrops when I'm supposed to!! Eyes, I don't fuck around with them.
DAY 2:
1:30 AM Went out with Cherie for a bit, got food, went for a drive. Been keeping my eyes closed whenever I can, it's less irritating that way. Still remembering to put the drops in too. No extra pain, but a bit more blurry. Off to bed, will update in morning if I can still see.
6:30 AM Woke up with super dry and scratchy eyes, it was so bloody hard to put the eyedrops in cause I couldn't stop squinting! Eventually I got them in and went back to sleep.
11:30 AM Woke up, eyes feeling great! Can't see worth a damn though.
1:30 PM No pain at all, Cherie drove me to get my follow up, they said I was healing super fast, but tonight might still be really painful. I haven't used the numbing drops at all yet. He put some in though and my eyes felt fucking awesome.
2:30 PM Back at Cherie's house everything started looking crystal clear, even close-up stuff wasn't too bad for a while.
5:30 PM Ended up downtown on the beach for a while with Valyce, Cherie, Mark and Pearce. Beach isn't as fun when you can't face the sun and have to cover up your eyes with clothing. My face is prolly the only thing that isn't tanned.
6:30 PM On the drive home my eyes are starting to hurt. The drops don't help. Nooooooo
8:30 PM We've dropped everyone off, and stop at Shopper's to get more Refresh Tears. Jesus Christ they are expensive!!! I'm in quite a bit of pain at this point. CHerie drops me off at home and I have a nap.
10 PM I wake up to eat, my eyes feeling fine. In the middle of eating (I can barely see my food,,, frustrating) my eyes start killing me. It feels like they're too big for my goddamn sockets. So I decide to take a T3, have a Valium, and go to bed. I couldn't fall asleep right away for I gave in and used the numbing drops. THEY ARE AMAZING!!!!
DAY 3 8 AM I wake up, my eyes are feeling AWESOME. I put my drops in and am going back to bed. (After updating this for yesterday)
4:30 PM Been sleeping most of the day, Eric's gonna be here soon for The Slurrey Show. My vision is really really blurry. A weird kinda blurry. Everything is sharp, except there's like 10 of it, in a circle.
11:30 PM Driving around with Cherie at night. Traffic lights all look like bubbles. I can barely friggin see! Besides that, no pain or discomfort in my eyes whatsoever. I'm light sensetive though so I still have to wear my sunglasses at night. (insert yet another lame Corey Hart joke here)
DAY 4: 8:30 AM Woke up and everything is STILL blurry. Durrrr? Still light sensetive too, but it's no problem with shades on, even in the daylight. I have to wear these things everywhere! Durrrr. I got my 72 hour follow-up appointment at 2:20, they're taking out the protective contacts today! YAY
Posted by MiKE @ 10:06 PM (PST)
If you jizz in space, will your jizz be propelled endlessly across the universe? Unless it gets caught up in a planet's gravity or a black hole (not your mom's)? Will the cold temperatures of space preserve your jizz, enabling any aliens who find it to create a new human race? Or will they eat it as a snack?
Will they like the taste of jizz so much that they will trace its trajectory back to earth? Will they take over the planet and harvest endless amounts of jizz? How will they harvest jizz? Will they use alien-created milking machines or will they just suck everyone's dick?
Posted by MiKE @ 11:46 AM (PST)
So I went and saw THE DARK KNIGHT the other night, a movie I've been looking forward to seeing for YEARS!
So what did I think about it?
I'd say it'd be pretty fucking amazing.... IF I HAD SEEN THE LAST 10 GODDAMN MINUTES OF IT!!! As the movie was almost ending, the power in the movie theatre went out.
What followed next was a plethora of "what the fucks" and "you gotta be shitting me's" from the jam-packed theatre.... it was true bullshit! What could potentially be my favorite movie EVER got buttraped by a blown fuse or whatever the fuck caused the power to go out in that ONE building.
That's ok, we're gonna go see it in IMAX. Which hopefully won't suffer a power outage causing me to miss the last 5 minutes of the movie. Assholes!
Posted by MiKE @ 9:38 PM (PST)
So I'm at future shop the other day with Erin and Eric, and I see a game I want called "Mass Effect". Erin bought it for me since she owed me money anyways, and today I try and install it on my PC.
It doesn't install. Gives me an error about some file not being found or something. Probably due to some type of copy protection put on the disc.
Yay Bioware, thanks for the copy protection keeping me from playing my own game! Now I have to download an illegal cracked version instead, cause it's the only way I'll be ever to play the damned thing!
Posted by MiKE @ 10:22 PM (PST)
In the future, vehicle engines will be powered by our shit. No really. The stuff that comes out of your ass, it will be taking you to the supermarket in 10 years.
You ask how? Well due to high oil demand we need alternatives that are plentiful and easy to harvest. And what is more plentiful than shit and farts?
You have to wonder how the idea came about. Buddy goes to the gas station to fill up on gas, and is so pissed off at paying $1.37/litre that he farts in anger. He remembers how he used to light his farts on fire at college parties, and ponders why the fuck he's emptying his wallet on something that does the same thing as what comes out of his butt for free?
I swear man gas prices are so bad these days, who hasn't considered funneling a coiler into their gas tank?
PS I'll update tslurrey soon with pics! Oh, and I have to disable the message board for now, it's been hijacked by spam bots. I have to fight spam bots? Jesus christ it's only 2008 and we're already battling fucking robots.
Posted by MiKE @ 7:56 PM (PST)
You know what sucks? Fucking driving around here. It seems as though my vehicle is a magnet for other vehicles. Am I that invisible or something? I drive a pretty big car, so you'd have to be like 47 different kinds of stupid to not see it as you're changing lanes or turning. Which brings me to a wonderful incident on Scott Rd last week.... I'm driving in the center lane and TWO cars try to merge into me from either side of me, AT THE SAME TIME. A moment of raw unrefined stupidity that probably lost me 30 IQ points just for being there. And I wasn't even driving in Richmond! Fark.
Random MSN convo time between me and El Valito.
{*~Sandy Streetcorner~*} says: It was sooooo warm today ^.^ {*~Sandy Streetcorner~*} says: *rolls around*
\m/ ( เนอกฬฏเน) \m/ says: LOL \m/ ( เนอกฬฏเน) \m/ says: you're so cute it hurts my nuts <3
{*~Sandy Streetcorner~*} says: LOL awwwwww, that was the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me <3
Posted by MiKE @ 6:23 PM (PST)
I've been lazy with my posts again, but that's ok.... probably no one reads this except Erin, who loves to point out how barren and lifeless slurrey looks (especially compared to her blog).
This post is gonna be completely random because I just came back from Erin's, and we all know what shenanigans happen on that patio of hers.
I'm thinking of changing the way slurrey looks, but it's not easy anymore. Now instead of simple HTML codes there's shit like "style sheets" and codes have colons and question marks in them. I feel fucking old because I don't know how to make my posts have rainbow text.
So now that the sun has finally come out after like 2 winters in a row, I feel the need to go outside and do something outdoorsy. Like uhhhhh..... fuck. What do people do outdoors these days? Fight dinosaurs? It feels like it's been THAT long since we last had weather decent enough to go outside in.
So I've had my High Definition video camera for a while now and taking it with me wherever I may find something worth filming. Uhhhhhh, so the only worthwhile clips I've taken so far are people headbanging in slow motion, dogs fighting in slow motion, other slow motion stuff, and Mya's baby Chloe acting so cute that if you're a chick, it'll kick you in the ovaries and jumpstart your biological clock. Unfortunately I can't really edit footage yet, as Adobe Premiere CS3 Pro (yeah the latest one) DOES NOT support AVCHD. What the fuck. That's like windows media player not supporting MP3 files.
I'd talk about rising gas prices but that calls for a whole other post, plus the issue pisses me off so much I may cockwhip the computer screen in anger. It's an LCD so I gotta be careful, I remember my old 21" CRT monitor was so sturdy, that thing took many dick punches to the screen, particularly during a blue screen of death, a program crashing and taking an unsaved file with it, or some viciously epic porn. LCD's don't take that shit though.
Posted by MiKE @ 10:34 PM (PST)
Today I nearly sharted myself. Luckily, I cut the fart short in the last possible millisecond, closing the gate and locking in the outpour of whatever wanted out of there so badly. Thank god for lightning quick reflexes.
This is why I don't like farting. Because in the farting process, the knowledge that the gas expelled may be accompanied by liquid or solid matter is usually aquired late in the sequence of events... in most cases too late. Thus the effect of sharting, when you fart and inadvertently shit your pants (ever so slightly) at the same time.
So my advice is, if you need to vent and don't know what else may come out, don't risk it!
Posted by MiKE @ 9:35 PM (PST)
Parts of this slurrey (webcam/forum) will be offline for a while due to the slurrey slerver getting anally fistfucked but some botnet virus!
I went out drinking with Shani and Valyce and a buncha people last night, it was great cause I drank a lot and got a 2 hour hangover that same night!
I noticed I've been slacking with puttin pics on here lately. You've probably noiticed too. That's cause I've been sticking mostly to facebook for posting pics, cause people can actually comment on each picture.... that's totally something slurrey needs!
Now I'm going to post the pic galleries I've been neglecting to link to:
#182 - BLOWING SHIT UP We went up to Eric's jolly good mountain in Abbotsford and blew shit up. Made some mushroom clouds, threw molotov cocktails off the cliff, the usual shit. It was good stuff, and the next day Valyce, Erin, Eric and I went to the sex show. I smelled like burnt plastic there. I also bot 2 things completely sex-unrelated there, a license plate frame and a custom slurrey symbol car sticker.
#183 - TRACY'S EPIC BARF PARTY This was horrible, I took one too many swigs out of my big ole bottle of Jose Cuervo (more like 10 swigs too many) and got a bit too hammered. Rolling around on the bed I apparently knocked Tracy's phone into a bucket of puke, Shannon was the only one there and wasn't 100% sure I did it either. I still paid for it regardless, cause I'm awesome like that. I puked half the night, and dry heaved the other half. Shannon had never seen anyone puke that epically, and Tracy made me a nice breakfast that morning.
#184 - PARTY AT DUDLEY'S A regular party at Dudley's for Dennis' early birthday. I took it easy that night and had a goddamn miniscule bottle of fireball. The party was great, though in the end we had a Life in the ER moment when Jessica got a piece of glass in her foot!
#185 - MONSTER TRUCKS, BOURBON, AND CHLOE Went and saw some monster trucks, it was alright. I was expecting more fireballs and cars getting busted up, but it was mostly monster trucks driving around in circles jumping over things over and over again. It got repetetive sorta fast. Then we went to the Bourbon and had some fun times. Next day we all hung out with Mya and her kid Chloe, what a cute baby! She even likes to chew on computer cords, finally someone likes the taste of plastic and electricity too.
#186 - FOGGY DEW I finally managed to coax Erin out on a friday night, we went to the Foggy Dew with everyone and did the drinkin thang again.
#187 - TRACY'S BIRTHDAY We went to the Tree Rock Pub for Tracy's birthday and it was an eventful night. Kelly and Kevin kept on buying me drinks, and well I don't remember most of the night. Roxanne got her shit ripped off or something, and somebody had left her with the bill for everyone's drinks. Kyle helped her out and paid for it though, a hero he is!
#188 - DUDLEY'S PARTY I don't remember much of this cause I chugged a fireball bottle and fell asleep.
#189 - SLURREY SHOW AND DENNIS' BBQ! Just a couple of pics from 2 or 3 slurrey shows, and Dennis's BBQ. The bbq was fun and stuff, and I used a fuckin BIDET for the first time ever. It was a weird experience, but after a lot of thought I decided that yes, bidets are a cool invention. After the BBQ we went to Mark and Jessika's and chilled for a while.
#190 - DUDLEY'S BDAY AT THE FOGGY DEW WE GOT DUDLEY HAMMERED. Then we went to Denny's for some grub, which was the same idea everyone else at the Foggy Dew had. Dudley did an epic thing all over Jessica's sweater. "You're lucky I'm stoned or I'd be so mad at you".
#191 - MISC JUNK Just a bunch of misc pics from a few things we did, I didn't take many pics for a 2 week period because I had gotten my new HI-DEF VIDEO CAMERA (I'll write about it soon), and was mostly using that to document parties and such.
Well that's about it for now.... PS Lookin to change the face of Slurrey soon, we've had the same layout for at least like 6 years!!!
Posted by MiKE @ 4:01 PM (PST)
Soooo you were expecting a huge slurrey april fools joke today, were ya?? Welll.... there isn't one! HA!
Happy april fools!
Betcha you didn't see that coming!! What can I say, I gotta keep you guys on your toes. (Not to mention the fact that I was feeling lazy this year... shhh)
In other news, I may actually start writing here again! Whether or not this is another april fools joke... we'll see!
Posted by MiKE @ 10:25 PM (PST)
Hey I'm still alive. Sorry to disappoint ya :P Been busy these days.... world domination takes a bit of planning ahead. I figure I should try and start posting again at least once a day, we'll see how that goes!
